Writing again..

So... I haven't written in a long while... there are several reasons for that. Mostly because I didn't want some people who know about my blog reading about what I had to say. I know, I know, then why journal online? Eh, one of the main reasons is because I type a lot better than I write - not to mention a lot faster. Secondary reason is that when it's saved on the internet it seems to never go away. (which might be a bad thing). I've written in books before and written on hard drives before - a couple of both have been lost - so I write here. And yes, I know my puncuation and spelling sucks, but it's allowed to here.

I think I've mostly decided that I'm not going to write a lot of detail about super emotional personal stuff here; but hell that may change too.

Biggest update. Dave and I are getting a divorce. I moved out at the end of April and then told him at the end of May that I wanted the divorce. There are multiple reasons and sadly he and I don't see eye to eye on most all of those reasons. My biggest heartache about the divorce is losing someone who was my best friend for 7 years. There is no one that has really stood by me in the way Dave did for those years and I will never feel ungrateful for all the support and love he always showed me. He really is such a good person. He's just not one that I'm in love with anymore.

Dave is now dating someone else and has been for a couple of months. I'm also seeing someone else, Sean. I've fallen hard and fast ... it's scary in a lot of ways ... and it's not something I expected at all. The last moment I expected to meet someone so wonderful would be while going through a divorce. I'm not going to go to far into detail about things with he and I at the moment. We'll just say for now that I'm very happy with where things seem to be leading with this very special man.

I've been keeping myself busy. My work with the horses has picked back up and is quite involved. I technically have 5 horses that I'm currently working with or riding, but I'm only riding 2 of them occasionally right now. Katie - I ride out at Patti's barn, but Patti is also doing a lot of work with her for the upcoming show season. Joshua - is my newest project and the one I'm riding the most, he's owned by a woman named Sue that I was introduced to by Patti. Sadie - Is another one of Sue's horses that I ride occasionally. Both Joshua and Sadie are fairly well trained in English and Sue (owner) would like them slowed down for Western, so I'm helping her work on that. I'm bringing Joshua to a lesson clinic Saturday evening. Finally I occasionally ride Blue and Suede. Arthur and Lynn are their owners. They'd like me to work with them a lot more this fall as Arthur will be very busy running his hurricane repair business. It's crazy busy and I love it, but I'm hoping to get settled in to working with only 1 or 2 horses soon so I can show that one specific horse during the show season. I dunno, we'll see how it goes.

I'm dealing with a horrific bout of insomnia recently. I don't really sleep well anymore period. I was hoping that writing would start to get me tired tonight but it seems to have been an idle hope. I've been seeing a therapist down here and the last time I spoke with her she suggested trying to find some hypnotherapy CD's for helping me to get to sleep or stay asleep. I haven't done that yet, but it really might be worth a shot. The lack of good sleep has been messing with my work schedule, and wreaking havic on my emotions. I'm keeping most of the emotional crap contained as I don't want it to bug others and well, for the most part it's not a huge deal and I can handle things fine ... but it's still starting to stress me out.

Anyhow, I'm going to sign out for now, maybe read for a bit and if that doesn't work take half of a sleeping pill to try and help me reach sleep.

P.S. Ewoks are da'bomb.